My cousin, Hayley, maintains a long and growing bucket list in her iPhone, complete with links and pictures. Mostly, it’s nature destinations and phenomena: this Iceland waterfall and that Arizona rock formation and also that bioluminescent bay in Puerto Rico, and, and, and...
Near the top of her list, for as long as I can remember:
See the northern lights
I, too, have always wanted to see the aurora. I’ve been captivated by its shimmering, otherworldly images my whole life. Aren’t we all? But for some reason I never sought out the when-where-and-how specifics.
Someday, I thought, and went on with my life.
Why didn’t I pursue a hope that was dear to me? Oh, things got busy, and it’s easier to prioritize surer things. But part of me wonders if it’s because the hope was so dear. Lowering my expectations is sneaky protection against the vulnerability of a big dream.
On our decade birthdays, Hayley, her sister, Leslee, and I celebrate with a trip. Leslee turned 60 this year, and it was time to choose a destination.
Leslee also keeps an ambitious bucket list and doesn’t hesitate to grab a good opportunity. In the last several years, she has boldly remade her life despite a full-time job, life-altering tragedy and other formidable obstacles. She’s on a self-made adventure none of us would have predicted for the introverted, bookish girl of her youth. But then, life rarely turns out as predicted.
Fairbanks, Alaska! she said. Let’s go see the lights!
Lights, camera, action! We hashed out the dates, chose the accommodations and booked the flights.
We picked a place called Borealis Basecamp but that didn’t mean we were guaranteed to see anything besides snow. The weather and solar conditions must cooperate for the aurora to be visible.
We kept our eye on the weather and an aurora app (there’s an aurora app). Forecast: Overcast, cloudy, overcast. Eclipse-chasers, I know you know how this feels.
I’ll cut to the chase. Our second night there, the clouds unexpectedly burned off, the solar storm lined up, and it happened.
We saw it. The aurora borealis, this thing I’ve wanted to see my whole life. This wonder I could have forgotten to pursue.
No more someday. And all it took was a little nudge.
Comment time
Do you keep a bucket list? Now I get the power of being specific about these things.
My other “someday” experience was hiking to Angel’s Landing in Zion National Park with my Dad (he was in his 70s at the time). Google Angel’s Landing. I’m honestly surprised it’s legal.
What’s your “someday?”
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Notes of note
- articulated the difference between “news” and “the news” in The Great Anti-Doom Scrolling Therapy Guide, Part 1, and it’s not to be missed.
“Gratitude shouldn’t be the province of young, scarless yoga instructors or vanity celebrity magazines. It is ours. All of ours. No matter how rain filled our life has been, I believe gratitude can and should be a birthright.” My kind of activism, from
: Could Gratitude Be Healing for Democracy?“I’m thinking about the time my dad told me I should get back into therapy. I was 35, still full of petulant complaint, fizzing away in a bacterial apartment north of Boston. I hated him for suggesting such a thing and told him so. That’s often how you know a piece of advice is useful: the inconsolable urge to tell the advice-giver to fuck off.” Keeping that nugget from Steve Almond in my parental back pocket, via his friend and former Dear Sugar partner,
. Steve and I once traded a series of funny tweets, so I may have a platonic crush on him forever. Also, I’m eating almonds right now, my preferred plane snack.Thank you to everyone who responded to last week’s Mailbag question looking back on limits you set (or didn’t) when your kids were younger. Your comments were wise and comforting. The Mailbag’s always open; submit your questions here.
I’m loosening up on the weekly newsletter schedule for a bit as I’m traveling + handling some family complications (I’m finishing this up on airplane wifi). Not sure what the next month will hold, but I’m feeling a deep sense of possibility. Join me on Instagram if you’d like to follow along between newsletters.
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These photos are incredible and I'm sure they pale in comparison to what it actually looked like. How cool.
WWOWOWOWOWOW!!!! How did it feel???? I'm dying to know!!!
My "someday" is Monument Valley in Utah. Every time I look at a photo of it, I feel like my legs might collapse. Maybe it's time to start thinking about booking....