I really love this. I wasn't familiar with his work -- but I just heard Stefan Sagmeister speak about his new book, Now Is Best -- and his point is pretty much the same. When we step back, we can see that things keep getting better. Even the things that seem to be getting worse. I needed to hear that.
Thank you, Liz. I'll check out Stefan's work. I need to be reminded over and over, in different ways, that noticing the good (and talking about it, out loud, and being grateful for it) does not mean denying or ignoring what's bad, or disrespecting struggle or injustice.
Oh, supporting grown kids is hard! Mine are both home now for the holiday, although one is heading back earlier than we planned because of an internship... Which is good! But it's also bad! And I want to be supportive, but I also want him to know that I'm sad not to have him home longer, but not in a needy, clingy way - just in a "you are loved and missed" kind of way. Oh, the tightrope! What I'm finding interesting is how successful I've been in interacting with my kids when I apply the same rules of behavior I do with my spouse. All those years of learning how to collaborate rather than control, ask questions rather than declare, fighting only about what we're fighting about. It's hard to see them as adults sometimes, but when I treat them like adults things always go better. Sounds like that's what you're doing. Brava, Mama! Happy Holidays! Looking forward to reading more in the New Year.
Wow, Tara, what you said about kids/spouses...profound!!! That "I miss you but not in a needy way, but also, it's not bad to need each other, and also, no pressure, and also, isn't that what love is, the work of relationship???" I run into this too.
Thank you for the shoutout Asha, and finding that balance between support and letting your kid navigate their life is HARD. I'm just at the beginning of that journey. Wishing you and your family a lovely holiday!
I really love this. I wasn't familiar with his work -- but I just heard Stefan Sagmeister speak about his new book, Now Is Best -- and his point is pretty much the same. When we step back, we can see that things keep getting better. Even the things that seem to be getting worse. I needed to hear that.
Thank you, Liz. I'll check out Stefan's work. I need to be reminded over and over, in different ways, that noticing the good (and talking about it, out loud, and being grateful for it) does not mean denying or ignoring what's bad, or disrespecting struggle or injustice.
Oh, supporting grown kids is hard! Mine are both home now for the holiday, although one is heading back earlier than we planned because of an internship... Which is good! But it's also bad! And I want to be supportive, but I also want him to know that I'm sad not to have him home longer, but not in a needy, clingy way - just in a "you are loved and missed" kind of way. Oh, the tightrope! What I'm finding interesting is how successful I've been in interacting with my kids when I apply the same rules of behavior I do with my spouse. All those years of learning how to collaborate rather than control, ask questions rather than declare, fighting only about what we're fighting about. It's hard to see them as adults sometimes, but when I treat them like adults things always go better. Sounds like that's what you're doing. Brava, Mama! Happy Holidays! Looking forward to reading more in the New Year.
Wow, Tara, what you said about kids/spouses...profound!!! That "I miss you but not in a needy way, but also, it's not bad to need each other, and also, no pressure, and also, isn't that what love is, the work of relationship???" I run into this too.
Thank you for the shoutout Asha, and finding that balance between support and letting your kid navigate their life is HARD. I'm just at the beginning of that journey. Wishing you and your family a lovely holiday!
BIG HEARTS BACK TO YOU