Holiday card friendships

The beauty of keeping in touch once a year

I hope your holiday has been lovely so far. Hanukkah begins tonight which means our already-low-key festivities are tucked into the quiet space between Christmas and New Year’s Eve. Extra-mellow and relaxed! I love it!

Photo credit: Gary Sankary

I’m putting the finishing touches on my holiday cards right now. At this point I should just call them New Year cards because I generally start pulling them together in mid-December. That’s when the spirit hits me and I’m ready to dig in.

Much as I love sending holiday cards, in the past I dreaded the work and hand cramps that came with stuffing, addressing, sealing and stamping a hundred-plus envelopes. But now the whole thing feels soothing and important; a tangible way to connect in a world buzzing with electronic communication.

It’s not just the physicality of holiday cards I appreciate, it’s also their infrequency. Part of the appeal of texting a friend or liking a Facebook post is that it takes a second. I love me a good single-emoji text! But because they’re so quick, these electronic pings are more frequent. Again, lovely (don’t stop texting me!!), but tracking and responding on all the channels comes with its own particular demand on time and attention. I struggle to keep up. Unanswered texts aren’t just junk mail or random social media updates — these are people I know and love! — so the emotional stakes ratchet up, too.

This is why I love that holiday cards haven’t gone fully digital (yet). I love that in this day and age there’s still a meaningful way to be in touch once a year. I love getting a card from someone I haven’t seen or spoken to since the kids were little. Whether or not our paths or algorithms cross next year, it’s evidence we remain a part of each others’ lives. For me, that’s what’s matters most.

Related reading

Why I shredded 38 years-worth of old journals

Notes of note

Some notes contain affiliate links. Here’s my policy.

• I just reread Meditations for Mortals by Oliver Burkeman. It has only deepened my sense of calm and contentment, and I say that as one currently allergic to self-improvement and life optimization. (Details at Amazon or Bookshop.org.)

• I baked this shortbread for a friend’s holiday party and it was a hit. I added a little orange flower water to get the dough to stick together, and I put it back in the oven a few times to get just the right level of light golden brown. (NYT Cooking gift link.)

• The holiday lights in our neighborhood are more sparkly and colorful than ever. I DIG IT. What’s delighting you right now?

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Finally, I want to say how grateful I am for your presence this year. I’m spending less and less time online with the exception of here, and that’s because of your generosity and kindness. We’re real people here together, you know? A special thank you to those of you who’ve paid for a subscription for any length of time — your support and partnership mean so much to me. Happy holidays from my family to yours. See you next year.