Parent of Adults is a newsletter about life after the kids grow up.

They grow up! This is the opposite of a surprise. I mean, it’s what kids do, and it’s wonderful.

But…it’s also weird.

Both my kids adults live out of state — one’s a rising college senior; the other’s a college graduate living and working in the Midwest. I love, and I mean love, being the parent of these young adults and I thought I was prepared for the inevitable shift when they moved out. But this next iteration of family life has been way more than a shift; it’s a whole new world. Parenting, my marriage, work, relationships, my identity and even my sense of purpose...everything’s changed.

This is both thrilling and unsettling, to say the least. 🤯

Parent of Adults is my invitation to compare notes.

I’m discovering that “empty nesting” is far more complicated than the cultural stereotypes let on. Surprise, surprise — this is not unlike how I felt when I was a dazed new parent wondering is it like this for everyone???

I started this newsletter for two reasons:

  1. to process my empty nesting journey

  2. to hear and talk about yours.

Our experiences are sure to differ, with our own unique stumbling blocks and lightbulb moments. This is a place to gather and swap stories as we adjust to these strange, new lives in this strange, new world.

I’m betting we’ll discover we’re not alone — and we never were.

You in? Great! Subscribe now, free or paid.

About me

I’m Asha Dornfest, a writer and parent of two young adults.

I’ve been writing books since the mid-90’s and hosting online parenting conversation since the early aughts. I’ve written several books, the most popular of which is Parent Hacks: 134 Genius Shortcuts for Life with Kids, based on my community blog of 10+ years.

Before Parent Hacks, I co-wrote Minimalist Parenting: Enjoy Modern Family Life More By Doing Less with my friend and thought partner Christine Koh, which led to our co-hosting 250+ episodes of the Edit Your Life podcast. I retired from podcasting in 2021, and the pod continues to thrive as a solo show by Christine.

My husband, Rael, and I have lived in Portland, Oregon for over 20 years. We love it here. My mom moved to Portland after my dad died suddenly in early 2020. We’re all adjusting, gradually, together.

Subscriber benefits

Free subscribers

Free subscribers receive weekly-ish posts via email and/or the Substack inbox with pauses for rest and life. Most posts are public. Comments are open to everyone for a week after publication, and archived posts remain public for six months.

Paid subscribers

Paid subscribers get additional perks: unlimited commenting privileges, full access to the unlocked archive, occasional private posts, and my heartfelt gratitude. 🙏🏽✨

Why pay when most of this is free?

When you upgrade to a paid subscription, you support the work that goes into this newsletter. Your financial support allows me to devote time and energy here without my having to think about funding from ads or sponsors — a win for all of us.

(I use affiliate links but only for books or products I’m already talking about.)

More meaningful, I think, is the “voting with your wallet” kind of support. Supporting creative work you care about is one way to help bring about the world you hope for. If this newsletter (or my work over the years) sparks that feeling in you, well, I’d be honored by your support.

Paid subscription starts at $5 for one month, or you can choose an annual subscription ($36) which works out to $3/mo.

If you’d like to reduce credit card charges, you might prefer a Lifetime subscription: a one-time payment of $50 gets you a “forever comp” subscription which means you retain paid benefits for as long as you’re subscribed.

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However you choose to support my work — by reading, commenting, sharing, or paying — I’m grateful. Thank you.

I hope you’ll join me. The empty nest is only the beginning…and it isn’t empty.

Say yes! Become a free or paid subscriber👇🏽

A note about gender & language: I write from my perspective as a cisgender woman (she/her). I welcome readers of all genders and do my best to use gender-inclusive language.

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A conversation about life beyond the empty nest with author Asha Dornfest

People

Writer & novice grownup. Author of PARENT HACKS, etc. Former co-host of the Edit Your Life podcast.